When we first met I thought you were charming
But now I fear I've made a big mistake
You’re handsome and yet, it's oh, so alarming
You’ve got an irritating habit, you're at it like a rabbit
Now part of me is starting to ache
Just shut up, please stop talking
Your constant need to natter isn't cute
Pipe down, stop your squawking
You’re so much more attractive when you're naked and you’re mute
I’m bursting with passion
And I’m ready to pop
But still you whine and witter
Worse than Stephen Fry on Twitter
Please tell me that one-day you'll stop
Shut up, just be quiet
Your verbal diarrhoea makes me sick
Why not try a diet
Of fifty words a fortnight maybe that would do the trick
I want you so badly
But you bore me to tears
Your foreplay is so wordy, your topics far too nerdy
There’s only thing getting hot…it’s my ears, oh
I’ve tried asking nicely
But you won’t shut your gob
You’re stuck at full volume
And I can’t find the knob
Try a sponsored silence, rest your tired old lungs
Let's find a better use for both of our wagging tongues. No?
Then shut up, I’m not impressed
You're using up some valuable air
Just zip it, and get undressed
I stopped listening last September what makes you think I still care?
I’m ready and waiting
So why they delay?
Am I intimidating?
What’s stopping us from mating?
There can’t be much more left to say
Yes the world will be a better place when darling you just shut your face
Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up!
The hind legs off a donkey they are yours for the taking
It doesn't seem to matter if you're sleeping or waking
I've nothing left to give, losing the will to live
Shut up, shut up, shut up
I'll stop talking now